I've been home, not employed for over 2 years now. The first 2 years I was the primary caretaker for my 80 something Mom who needed dialysis 3 bdays a week. I was'nt just sitting around, but I had time to keep up the house work, do some reading, play on the internet, etc. I had my early retirement money and the severance package my company gave me when I was downsized, plus Mom's social security and what we'd managed to save. By the time Mom passed away,we'd gone through quite a bit of the money, but not all.
After Mom died, I didn't know quite what to do with myself and I was more depressed than I expected. I figured Mom had been released from a lot of suffering that last 6 months so I expected to bounce back. I didn't really and I made some bad decisions with money.I bought so many things that were going to get me earning great money on the web, but either did'nt work. I couldn't understand, or I didn't follow through on.
The result is, I need to go back to work. On the one hand, I'm okay with that, but on the other, I'm as scared as I was when I had to take care of myself after my divorce.There's the added problem of being embarrassed and a little ashamed of myself.
I'll survive, but It's a pain too. I guess some things we don't seem to outgrow.
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